What is your idea of perfect happiness?
A life of adventure, scars, stories, and wine.
What is your greatest fear?
Not living up to expectation.
Which historical figure do you most identify with?
Icarus. Not genuinely historical, but I certainly relate. Too much, too fast, too soon. Remarkable lack of restraint, very little self-control.
What is the trait you most deplore in others?
What is your greatest extravagance?
Records. Lots and lots of vinyl. I want an original copy of The Human Beinz’ “Nobody But Me”, but it’s a hundred bucks for the original vinyl. I have two copies already but they’re not the original. That sort of stuff happens to me all the time.
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
Honesty. In truth, loyalty is significantly more important. I find a lot of comfort in the Tom Waits lyric “I’ll tell you all my secrets but I’ll lie about my past.”
Which living person do you most despise?
Any politician who actually wants to be a politician.
Which words or phrases do you most overuse?
“Here’s the problem…” or “Fuck.”
What is your greatest regret?
Out of respect for her privacy, I won’t mention her name. Either her or Article 108 of the Uniformed Code of Military Justice which is destruction of government property.
What or who is the greatest love of your life?
Rebekah, the Navy, music, in that order, most of the time.
When and where were you happiest?
Anytime I’m playing catch with my father.
What is your current state of mind?
I feel like the moment of respite in between collisions in a boxing match.
What do you consider your greatest achievement?
Covering the earthquake in Haiti for the U.S. Navy.
If you could choose what to come back as, what would it be?
An underwater archaeologist.
What is your most treasured possession?
My father’s record collection. It informed me, fueled me, fed me, inspired me. Then, just when I was ready, dad gave them to me.
What do you most value in your friends?
Their willingness to tolerate and love me without trepidation or want of anything in return.
Who are your favorite writers?
Lenny Bruce, Lester Bangs, Frank O’Hara, Christopher Moore, Hunter S. Thompson, and The Daily Show’s writers.
Who are your heroes in real life?
My Navy mentors.
How would you like to die?
Mauled to death in a wolverine den following a parachute mishap.
What is your motto?
“Spit on your hands and hoist the black flag.”